Dys-"Fun"-ctional

Who's to say what is dysfunctional or not?  We all come from different walks of life and everyone cannot be familiar with the others upbringing.

I am a city boy from the South Side of Chicago (currently living in Madison, WI), I grew up in a low income area.  As a kid and young adult, I was introduced to what many people would consider unbelievable.  When you are in a Big City, you grow up fast.  So fast that you miss your childhood because you are so anxious to do what the grown ups are doing.  That leads me to another questions: When are you considered a grown up/adult?  We all know those 40 yr old kids that will not leave there parents house and we know the kids that get kicked out as a teenager but what qualifies someone as being an adult?

Is it when you are able to take care of your personal responsibilities?  Is it when you reach the ages of 18-21?  I am curious as to what makes us think we are grown?  As a man, I feel I am an adult but I would never consider myself grown.  To me grown means you are done with growing and I am all about Growth and Development.  I am growing everyday in some form or fashion so I will never label myself as grown.  When I consider myself grown, I will not be able to tell anyone cause my life would have expired.

I have given my opinion on the matter and I think there are so many people out in the world that consider themselves grown and taking on the roles as parents and adults but don't want the full time job of being that adult nor do they want the responsibilities everyday.  This is where I think Dysfunctional Families come into play. Many are worried about the fun and they lose sight as to how Dys-Fun-ctional they really are.  They are creating a circle of life by reproducing, cause kids only know what you show them. An if you show them that being Dys-Fun-ctional is the way to go than be prepared for that next generation to come with the same exact attitude.  Have Fun!

This is just one man's opinion...

"Face" life & "Book" a trip to reality...

Facebook (FB) is a social website that I feel is abused more than used for good but this is one man's opinion.  I have been ask by many friends that are now FB addicts, "Why you didn't accept me to be your friend on FB? Are we not friends?".  I thought if we were friends in the "Real World" that should be good enough. I don't have as much time as the average FB addict to check my page 60 plus times a day.  I don't have FB alerts that come to my phone, I might visit the site once a month.  I have more people wanting to be my friend on FB than I have friends on FB.

Its not that I am against FB but it tickles me how many people have so much time to spend on this social website.  When majority of the time, the people that are on the site are talking about tacos that they burnt.  My purpose for getting a profile was I wanted to see what all of the hype was about, in the process I got in contact with some old friends.  After finding out that they are doing good or telling me whatever they wanted to tell me, I moved on with life.  That was cool!

Looking at it from, Mark Zuckerberg point of view.  It is very beneficial for everyone, especially him.  Everyone in the world can have hundreds of friends and hide behind a page that shows the world what ever image that person choose to portray.  Also you have those who are so bored that FB is their reality so they are content with FB for the rest of their life.  For many businesses it is free advertisement and a easy way to go Global in a matter of minutes.

As we know I am not at a M. Zuckerberg status so I don't have the time to waste on burnt tacos.  I have to put more energy into my personal/professional growth.  I do check my page from time to time just for a laugh which usually turns into disgust because usually there is someone that has posted so many status updates that makes me wonder, "Where do they get all of this time, when I don't think there is not enough time in the day". So I end up getting off of FB and doing some homework but just because FB is not for me right now does not mean its not a Great Creation for the world.

In Love with Love

I think a lot of people now a days are in love with love.  Not so much the person they are in a relationship with or the person that they are married to.  Its the image that has been portrayed to us all with the house, wife/husband, kids, dog name Marshmallow.  I really don't see many people putting in the work it takes to even learn about their significant other.  How can you love someone you don't know!  What wrong with taking time to learn about someone's likes and dislikes as well as sharing your own? What is the rush with having someone by side that you are not even comfortable with.  Are we really this lonely that we will be willing to accept anyone that makes you comfortable at the beginning of your friendship/relationship.  I am not bitter about love but I am not willing to settle for anything or have my kids attached to anyone that I do not know.  I'm just wondering is it love that is being chased or is it someone to travel down the journey of life with cause we don't want to be alone?

Whiskey & Cigarettes...

I am very proud to say I am the grandson of Delores "Dorothy" McDaniels! I say that cause I know I was a very difficult and uncontrollable teenager.  Living in a Big City gave me all type of opportunities, negative/positive but with me not having any male role models or father figures beside guys that were doing anything to make money.  It made it easy for me to add to the negativity in life.  I was afraid of nothing under the sun besides my grandmother but now that I think about it, I respect for my grandmother  more than feared her. It was the way she handled situations, the way she talked to me to let me know I was still a child and as a young man I had to be responsible for my actions.

It is still amazing to me how she was able to make me feel like such a special part in her life but also maintain a close knit family unit with her 13 children and so many other grand kids.  Dorothy didn't allow excuses to be an option.  She would explain a situation and help you understand the pros and cons of your actions.  My grandmother was a Gentle Giant, she was the type of person you would go to when you knew you were in the wrong but wanted to get the correct guidance.

When my grandmother pasted away, I didn't know how to accept that lost of life.  I was destroyed and didn't know how to control myself.  I went off the deep end and became very violent.  I felt betrayed and questioned why would my grandmother leave me in the Cold World alone.  She was the only adult supervision/guidance I was willing to accept.

Although Camel cigarettes with no filters and Jack Daniels whiskey is the smell I relate with my grandmother but I also relate those smells with strength and independence.

I will always have a missing piece of myself because my Grandmother is physically no longer around but I try everyday to keep her spirit alive.

We Fall Down!

I get tremendous inspiration from the song "We Fall Down" by Donnie McClurkin.  This song inspires me to go out on a limb and try anything that I think of.  The song tells us all that we do fall down but we get up so nothing can break you but yourself.  I think we all need motivation like this to let us know that even if we are not familiar with certain situations or when we fear our next challenge.  Go ahead and accept that challenge or attempt that situation and even if you fall, its OK and Get Back Up.  Maybe try it another way or come at it from different angle but don't worry about falling or failing cause you can get up from that small failed attempt.  I encourage everyone that read this blog to listen to the song at least once. I am not a big gospel person but its a very inspirational song and maybe the song can light that fire under you that you need to hurdle your next obstacle.

Procrastination of Education...

Why would I do something as simple as not apprecitate Education?  Its free, its all about building me as a person and I am not appreciating the fact that I can help myself and open many door ways but just being the best student I can be.  I am posting this blog 2 mins before the deadline because I am cheathing myself and I apologize the my class and especially my instructor.......I can't complain about not being where I want to be in life and cheating myself at the same time.

Education Open Doors!